When music is too loud, and other anti-social teenage behavior!

Getting on with the neighbors is something everyone wants to do and sometimes your teenager can make this difficult. They are less bothered by what other people think than you are; especially when those people are adults, so often do not understand your desire to observe social etiquette. They will ask friends round and play loud, often repetitive music and happily shout at each other above the din. Current music trends have a lot of bass in them and this has wall penetrating properties!

You want them to be able to invite friends round but those friends need to understand that your elderly next door neighbor is in bed by nine and does not much appreciate hip hop at all hours. The summer months can be worse as the music gets carried outdoors, along with barbecues and, if you are lucky enough to own one, pool splashing. Whatever you feel, do not shout above the noise at your teenager and embarrass them in front of their friends. This is one of those, set the rules before it happens, occasions.

Have a chat with your teenager about being a good neighbor. Point out the fact that many a ball has been handed back over the years, as they flew over the fence, and that the neighbors have a right to peace and quiet in their own home. Negotiate times when music can be played at party level, do not leave them to party on their own and enforce the agreed curfew, however much they protest.

Teenagers are very influenced by their friends in this respect, so you need to enlist other parents help. Often the teenagers will collude, saying that certain practice is accepted at other houses, when in fact it is not. You need to stick to your guns and be smart enough to talk to their friends parents and establish a code of behavior you all agree to. Your son or daughter wants to have fun and in an odd way, wants their friends to think you are a cool parent that allows a certain amount of boisterous behavior. Flattering as it is to be thought of as cool, rules are your job and your teenager has to learn to follow them.

Try to achieve a balance between week day and weekend rules. Restrict the number of friends round and agree that parties are for specific occasions and neighbors need warning. Your teenager will be someone's neighbor in the future; they need to learn how to be a good one.