What to do when your teenager's clothes become extreme!
You used to enjoy shopping for clothes for your child, now they shop for themselves; you are just needed to supply the funds! What do you do when your teen suddenly starts dressing like someone from a horror movie? Firstly, there may be rules about school clothes and your teen will have to follow those rules or risk getting expelled. However, at home, there are no rules exactly, just personal taste. It is very likely that, at some point, your teen will wear clothes that you hate, in the same way you probably wore clothes your parents loathed.
Rule number one, avoid your gut reaction; do not demand that your teen takes the clothes off!! Take a deep breath and try to remain neutral in your response. Your teen may be wearing extreme clothes to shock you, or to fit in with some new friends. If you mute your reaction, you may be able to find out the reasons behind the new garb. If shocking you is the intention, having failed, your teenager may simply abandon the new look or at least tone it down. If this is part of fitting in with a new group of friends, be prepared to see lots more teens looking slightly bizarre, because you need to meet these friends for your own peace of mind.
If the extreme is something offensive, e.g. a racist slogan on a tee shirt, then you have the right to ask your teen not to wear clothes that offend, and explain why they are offensive. Immodest clothing is another area for discussion. Whilst the fashion may be for extremely short skirts and dresses; it puts your teenager at risk if they go out and about dressed this way. Agree a compromise on how short is acceptable, explaining that being able to see too much of a teenager's body can be seriously misinterpreted by members of the opposite sex and put the teenager in danger.
Your teenager wants to express themselves through their clothes and as long as it does not contravene school rules or rules of common decency, you should try to tolerate their experimentation. You may be upset that your son has cut his lovely hair, brutally short, or that your daughter will not be seen dead in a dress, but you will have to put up with it. Remember, all fashion is transitory and come prom night, your son in a tuxedo and your daughter in a frock will be some of your best memories!