What is teen boarding school therapy?

As a parent, there is only so much we know, and only so much we can learn all at once! When your normally polite child turns into a sullen, defiant and rude ogre, most parents head for the Internet or the library, or help groups to try and work out what to do. It is only natural as parents to feel there must be an answer out there, if only you can find it.

Then, you are faced with a whole barrage of terms, and if you meet parents several years into managing a defiant teen, you, the newbie, can feel totally bemused by what they are talking about. Teenagers who are defiant, out of control and getting into trouble, need help, what this help is called is almost irrelevant. Of far greater importance than clever terms, is whether the help on offer will truly be of benefit to your family.

I think it will help, if you see the terms as describing different stages of teenage defiance and disorder.

Counseling - low level defiance, anxiety, withdrawal

• Many schools have a counselor, and they will be the first step that a principal may take when faced with a troubled student. Counselors listen. That is their primary function.


• Once they believe the teenager has told them enough to warrant a response or suggestion, they will advise a course of action. They will often say that a troubled teen may need several counseling sessions, as they feel there are still issues the teenager needs to get off their chest.


• Counselors refer; if they believe a teenager needs more professional help, they will suggest that the teen goes to see a psychologist/psychiatrist/their medical practitioner/ a therapist of a specific variety.

School counselors vary in their effectiveness and level of training, so ask what qualifications they have; if not many, find your teenager a professionally qualified counselor who can help them to voice and deal with their fears and anger.

Therapy- longer term, more serious defiance, specific personality disorders

• Counseling may only be the start of the journey your teenager needs to go on, to modify their behavior.


• Therapists are trained professionals, specializing in different disciplines and are experts in different areas of mental or psychological disorder.


• Being "in therapy", describes a process, not a one off treatment, it is a commitment to a longer term changing of behavior and attitudes


• Counseling is a form of therapy, but when you add the word treatment then you have moved beyond the listening/talking approach


• Psychodynamic therapy focuses on unconscious patterns of behavior and the relationship between the therapist and patient.


• Cognitive behavioral therapy focuses on challenging the patients' beliefs and thoughts to transform emotions and behavior.

Many adolescent therapists focus on behavior modification techniques and teen boot camps, boarding schools and wilderness camps, all aim to modify the teenager's behavior. The type of therapy or counseling you choose for your defiant teenager will depend on how badly defiant they have become. Anxiety and intermittent acting out, should benefit from counseling. Aggressiveness and substance abuse needs the services of trained therapists.