How to prevent teenagers from running away
If parents are going through hell with their teenager and are losing control of their teens behavior they may worry that the teenager will resort to running away as a means of dealing with the conflict. There are some teens that use running away as an automatic response to disagreements, and their parents may have sought help and counseling for these teenagers. However, the parents still have to deal with the possibility that at any stage, their teen may up and run.
What can a parent do to prevent, or at least lessen the chances of their teenager running away? Many teens feel ganged up on by adults, but if they see an issue as a problem to be solved, and are praised for solving it, rather than as a hopeless confrontation they are doomed to lose, they are less likely to run away from the situation.
When parents are arguing with their teens, the most common complaint from teens is that their parents never listen to them. Consider, for a moment, if your boss was angry with you, because you made a mistake, and dealt with it by yelling at you and not listening to your explanation, how would you feel? Many adults would resolve to leave that job, is that not a sort of running away?
Your teenager may pretend not to care about what you think, this may or may not be true, but despite their apparent indifference, they do want to know that you care about them. The occasional, "how are you" and "how was school today?" lets a teenager know you are interested. They may respond with a grunt, or even complain that you are "always hassling" them for information, but be assured, they will be much happier with that than feeling ignored.
Having a chat with your teen that has nothing to do with their behavior, and is not a series of orders or instructions, establishes a foundation for them to build on, and they will be more willing to talk to you when it really matters. If you really suspect that they may have considered or be considering running away, you need to talk to them. Use a story from the papers, explaining that you cannot actually stop them running away, but that it is dangerous out there and you cannot protect them, which you see as part of your job as a parent.
You need to explain that there are other ways to deal with problems, and that maybe when they are ready, you should sit down and talk about these other solutions. Do not push them to talk to you, offer them a chance to come to you when they are ready, but also, let them know you are aware that teens run and that clearly, you do not want them to choose that as a solution to their problems. Nobody can ever stop the determined teenager from running away, but you can at least reduce the chances of them choosing that option.